THE BOOK OF DAMN
YANKEES
OTHERWISE KNOWN AS THE BOOK OF MANIFEST DESTINY
Poe proves that Yanks are sensitive
Chapter 70
And then there was hEdgar Allan Poe,
2iFor some reason.
3jIt was Poe who invented the great Yank tradition that requires American writers to drink themselves to death,
4Which proves how sensitive they are,
5Even though they’re Yanks.
6kIt was also Poe who wrote ‘The Raven,’
7Which every Yank has to memorize in school and goes something like,
8“Once upon a something something weary,
9l“Over many a quaint and something volume of forgotten something,
10“Something something,
11m“Nevermore,”
12And proves just how great Poe must have been,
13nUntil he wrote all those horror stories,
14oAnd drank himself to death,
15Unless it was the other way around.
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Chapter 70 / 154