THE BOOK OF DAMN
YANKEES
OTHERWISE KNOWN AS THE BOOK OF MANIFEST DESTINY
The south gets kind of bitterCuster surprises the Indians
Chapter 50
It was during Grant’s two terms in office that the south got kind of bitter about how everything had turned out.
2In the old days, the south had lots of kplantations,
3lAnd a lot of money,
4mAnd a lot of big dresses,
5And a lot of fancy parties,
6nAnd a lot of exquisitely tailored southern gentlemen,
7oAnd a lot of beautifully fashionable southern belles,
8pAnd a lot of poor obedient slaves.
9In the new postwar days,
10qThe south had a lot of blackened ruins,
11rAnd a lot of grinding poverty,
12sAnd a lot of white robes and hoods made out of old sheets,
13tAnd a lot of lynching parties,
14uAnd a lot of disreputable and hard-drinking southern gentlemen,
15vAnd a lot of faded and unhappy southern belles,
16wAnd a lot of poor black freemen who couldn’t find a job,
17xUnless they wanted to run for the state legislature,
18aOr run from the Ku Klux Klan.
19But that’s the way things go sometimes,
20bHistory being what it is,
21And eventually everybody found a new way of life,
22In spite of Reconstruction,
23And the carpetbaggers,
24And President Grant,
25And everything else,
26cWhich is about par.
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Chapter 50 / 154