THE BOOK OF DAMN
YANKEES
OTHERWISE KNOWN AS THE BOOK OF MANIFEST DESTINY
Gettysburg is pretty upsetting
Chapter 40
Eventually all this led to the Battle of Gettysburg,
2Somehow,
3And the union blue fought the confederate gray out in the middle of the Pennsylvania countryside for three days,
4fArmed with the most modern and deadly weapons anyone had ever seen,
5Which they fired at each other from point-blank range,
6Until the fields of Gettysburg were covered with the bodies of thousands of gdead northerners,
7And thousands of hdead southerners,
8Which convinced iGeneral Pickett that the only way to top it all off,
9And be remembered forever,
10Was to send all the troops the south had left on a desperate cavalry charge,
11jStraight into the union artillery,
12Just to see what would happen.
13What happened was that the south lost fifteen thousand troops,
14kIn about half an hour,
15Bringing the total number of troops killed at Gettysburg up to an even lfifty thousand,
16And ensuring the late General Pickett an honored place in Confederate history,
17Forever.
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Chapter 40 / 154