THE BOOK OF DAMN
YANKEES
OTHERWISE KNOWN AS THE BOOK OF MANIFEST DESTINY
Another war with the British
Chapter 18
After Jefferson had had his two terms, the Yanks elected lJames Madison to succeed him.
2mMonroe decided that what the country needed was another war with the British,
3nSince the Brits were acting like they owned the whole Atlantic Ocean,
4oWhich they basically did.
5But Madison thought they should act nicer, so he started acting like the Yanks owned the Atlantic,
6pEspecially the Yank coastline,
7Which should have worked out all right,
8qSince the Brits were still having a big war with France,
9And might not try very hard against the Yanks.
10Monroe was right about the Brits not trying very hard,
11rBut underestimated the Brit navy,
12Which is always a big mistake,
13sAnd therefore had to learn the hard way,
14tBy getting his house burned down,
15uAnd a lot of other stuff too.
16Fortunately, things got worked out to everyone’s satisfaction after a while.
17vThe Brits signed a treaty saying they wouldn’t act like they owned the Yank coastline,
18wAnd the Yanks got to kill about three thousand Brits in one of the most lopsided victories anyone ever had against the Brits,
19After the treaty had already been signed.
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Chapter 18 / 154