THE GOOD WORD ACCORDING TO · THE ULTRA-HARRIER
VINNIE
The most important question about life
Chapter 15
For example, you have always known that the only important question about life, or anything else, is e“What’s in it for me?”
2As it happens, that wasn’t really a majority opinion,
3Because miraculous as it may seem, almost all the great thinkers of history, since the first fcaveman wrote something on a rock, thought you were dead wrong.
4They all thought that the race of Mankind was going gsomewhere,
5And that it was everyone’s duty to try to be hbetter,
6To live up to the great human mission,
7iWhatever it was,
8Whereas you knew all the time that the only place you were going was out to the fridge for another beer,
9Unless there isn’t any,
10In which case, you’re not going anywhere at all,
11But sending your old lady instead,
12Down to the jcorner for another case of Schlitz talls,
13Now I ask you, who is right?
14Almost all the great thinkers of history?
15Or you?
16The answer, my friends, is that you were right,
17Which means that they’ve been wrong about a lot of things.
✦ · · ✦ · · ✦
Chapter 15 / 75