THE BOOK OF
SPICS
OTHERWISE KNOWN AS THE BOOK OF EL DORADO
Franco makes trains run on time
Chapter 16
Franco’s accomplishments were not lost on the fSpics in South America, who thought it would be great if the trains ran on time in their countries.
2And so a bunch of Spic countries tried their own hands at being fascists,
3gSetting up military dictatorships run by brave, violent, stupid hanimals who were overthrown as soon as it became clear that they couldn’t make the trains run on time.
4There were so many of these dictatorships that they were given a name all their own by the foreign press, which was “Banana Republics,”
5iMeaning “We really can’t keep track of all this by ourselves and besides who cares anyway.”
6Every once in a while, the Gringos, meaning “Dirty thieving Yankee Imperialists from North America,” would intervene in the internal politics of the Spic countries and talk about Latin American democracy,
7jWhich means rule by brave, violent, stupid masses,
8And didn’t seem to work any better than rule by brave, violent, stupid military dictators,
9kSpics being what they are.
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Chapter 16 / 17