THE FIFTH BOOK OF APES, CALLED
LIES
OTHERWISE KNOWN AS THE SECOND BOOK OF LIES
Eve messes upNoah dooms dinosaurs
Chapter 4
hhThey believed that after getting Chosen as God’s special tribe,
2Their iiwisest leaders worked out a written contract with God,
3Called a Covenant,
4Which spelled everything out pretty clearly,
5About who was supposed to do what.
6For example, if jjGod yelled “Jump!” at the Chosen Tribe, they were supposed to ask, “How high?” and then get right to it,
7No matter what it was God wanted.
8In return for this sort of behavior, God agreed to look after the Chosen Tribe in his own special way,
9aSeeing to it, for example, that the Chosen Tribe would be specially singled out for persecution by every other tribe on earth,
10Forever.
11When they saw what a great Covenant they had made,
12The Chosen Tribe built a special ark to keep it in,
13So that they could read it whenever they got bconfused,
14Which was plenty,
15What with one thing and another.
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Chapter 4 / 14