THE FIFTH BOOK OF APES, CALLED
LIES
OTHERWISE KNOWN AS THE SECOND BOOK OF LIES
The apes come to believe in one GodEve messes up
Chapter 2
And so it happened that, in time, the apes came to believe that there was only one dGod,
2eWho had made everything all by himself,
3aIn seven days and seven nights,
4Starting completely from scratch,
5When everything was null and bvoid,
6cAt the beginning.
7And this was not all they believed,
8For they also believed that they were descended directly from the first two people on earth,
9Who were also dnot apes, but a man named eAdam and a rib named Eve,
10Who started out living in a fparadise called the garden of Eden,
11But got kicked out forever because gEve committed a great sin,
12By eating an happle she got from a serpent,
13iWhich turned out to be a bad apple,
14jBecause the serpent was really the devil,
15kAnd the apple was really the knowledge of lGood and mevil,
16nWhich Eve should have left alone,
17Because the apple turned out to be responsible for everything wrong in the world,
18oIncluding the Curse,
19pThe Mark of Cain,
20qThe Whore of Babylon,
21rThe Wrath of God,
22sThe Day of Judgment,
23tAnd much more besides,
24uEspecially sin and guilt, which everyone is full of from birth,
25vSo that there is no good and no peace of mind, except from the one God,
26wWhose name is xYahweh,
27But isn’t to be mentioned out loud,
28By anyone.
29Nor was this all they believed.
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Chapter 2 / 14