THE BOOK OF
KRAUTS
OTHERWISE KNOWN AS THE BOOK OF GÖTTERDÄMMERUNG
The German language sounds beautifulLots of Kraut geniuses
Chapter 7
It was oGoethe who made up the story of a man named Faust,
2Unless it was somebody else,
3pWhich it wasn’t,
4qBecause Goethe was the greatest writer who ever lived,
5rEven greater than Shakespeare,
6As any Kraut will tell you.
7sFaust was the Kraut who sold his tsoul to the devil in exchange for almost uunlimited knowledge and power on earth,
8For about a year,
9Until the vdevil came to collect the soul he had been promised,
10wWhich Faust thought was unfair,
11xFor some reason.
12This was such a great story that lots of other writers all over the world copied it,
13Including a Brit named aMarlowe,
14And a bunch of others too.
15But Goethe was the only one who got it right,
16Because only a Kraut could really understand what it was like to want power so much that you kind of forgot about what it would cost,
17Namely everything,
18bWhich is called being an overreacher,
19And proves just how great Goethe must have been to think up such an insane type of character,
20With nothing to go on but his imagination.
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Chapter 7 / 39