THE ADVICE OF THE ARCH-ANGEL MATTHEW · TO THE
KENSINGTONIANS
Figuring out the Christian thingIt’s every gang for itself
Chapter 28
But they did forget.
2Everything.
3And they’re going to take it out on a lot of people,
4Including your aancient enemies the Broad Streeters,
5But especially on you,
6Because they’ve decided that bunder the surface, the canimal called Man is a Kensingtonian,
7Which means that the nukes will all get used,
8Just like you’d use them if you had some in the garage.
9dWhat’s more, they’ve decided that Kensingtonians never ever change,
10Because here you are, two hundred years later, and your wife still has a black eye,
11eWhich is something they can’t forgive,
12And why they don’t bother to give you the benefit of the doubt,
13Or check to see if maybe your front yards aren’t a little cleaner than they used to be,
14Or your Saturday night parties a little less wild,
15Or your child-beating a little less frequent,
16Which would be progress, let’s face it,
17But they’re not in the mood for talking about progress,
18fWhen it comes to the race of Kensingtonians,
19gAnd all the nukes they’re going to fire off the next time somebody gets it in the face with a bottle at the corner tavern.
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Chapter 28 / 39