THE ADVICE OF THE ARCH-ANGEL MATTHEW · TO THE
KENSINGTONIANS
Keep your mouth full of gum
Chapter 10
If you’re a girl, of course, you should dress differently,
2But exactly like all the other cgirls,
3Meaning you should wear cheap, tarty clothes drenched in even cheaper dperfume,
4And tons of makeup, and I mean really trowel it on,
5And keep your hair gooed up with about five pounds of lacquer and dye and other junk,
6And keep your mouth full of gum all the time,
7No matter what,
8So that everyone will always know that you’re just exactly like everyone else,
9eAnd there’s no reason to pick your face out of the crowd.
10When you get folder, you can lay off the tarty clothes,
11And get really really gfat,
12And wear stretch pants,
13And curlers 100 percent of the time,
14hExactly as if you had somewhere to go later,
15Even though you never do.
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