THE BOOK OF
FROGS
OTHERWISE KNOWN AS THE BOOK OF GLORY
Napoleon has his idea about Russia
Chapter 16
Before he decided to conquer Russia, Napoleon acquired an empire that included most of western Europe,
2oExcepting England,
3And established pRule by Napoleon as the most universally practiced form of government in the western world.
4He even invented a new code of laws, which he named after himself and which included numerous new ideas about justice.
5For example, under the Napoleonic Code, people had to be given a trial before being guillotined, which was so revolutionary that it made people wonder why they hadn’t thought of it during the French Revolution,
6qUntil they remembered that the French Revolution had been started by Frogs.
7Napoleon also encouraged innovations in rfashion, including topless gowns for lady Frogs,
8sWhich made sense, since it was the French who had invented tbreasts.
9At the same time, Napoleon was doing quite well with the ladies personally,
10In spite of being so short,
11And had a famous affair with uJosephine,
12vWho turned out to be infertile,
13Which paved the way for wMarie Louise, who had a husband,
14But Napoleon got rid of him,
15xWhich is generally what happens when an emperor cuts in on your wife.
16Anyway, until he thought of conquering Russia, Napoleon had things pretty much his own way,
17yWhich was the only way he cared about.
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Chapter 16 / 40