THE BOOK OF THE VIP
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Karen Block lets people look up her dressGlittering mega-stars of the future
Chapter 56
But great as he is, Dustin won’t even have a part in the greatest movie that will be made in this new age,
2Because the movie called ‘Five Easy Riders’ will star a bunch of other people,
3Who will also become great stars,
4And go on to have brilliant careers of their own,
5rThanks to their posture, and their T-shirts, and their speech impediments,
6Not to mention their hair,
7Which will be really great,
8For as long as it lasts.
9‘Five Easy Riders’ will be all about what it’s like to be so tired of all the lies and platitudes that you just drop out,
10And go live with poor white trash somewhere,
11Played by sDennis Hippy,
12With a bunch of motorcycles,
13Played by tHolley Davidson,
14And cheap girlfriends,
15Played by uKaren Block,
16Not to mention illegal drugs,
17Which are important only because they move the plot along,
18Because none of these people are really bad,
19aSince all they really want to do is ride around and have some casual sex with people they meet on the road,
20bAnd only get high every once in a while,
21cBecause they’re natural people,
22dAnd just like to take their pleasures in a natural way,
23eLike everybody,
24fOnly without hurting anybody,
25Which is why they’re so unusual and admirable,
26And why this will be such a magnificent movie.
27Anyway, the way it works out is that Jack Nickerson used to be a concert pianist,
28gOnly he hates classical music,
29hBecause it’s so full of artifice and pretense,
30iBesides being so darn hard to play,
31jWhich is why Jack prefers the natural life,
32Where everything is easy and free,
33And explains why he puts on his football helmet and goes off with kPaul Fonda and Dennis Hippy on their motorcycle,
34Which they’re glad to take him with them on,
35Because he says such amusing things,
36Like the part about holding the chicken salad between the waitress’s knees,
37Which is just hilarious,
38And shows why lCary Grant will have to retire,
39Because they don’t come much suaver than Jack Nickerson,
40mWho is actually a real good guy,
41In spite of what he does to Karen Block at the end of the movie,
42nBecause she just couldn’t free herself from all the rotten conventions of society,
43oLike marriage and all that stuff,
44pWhich just don’t make any sense,
45qEspecially coming from a girl who lets absolutely everyone look up her dress whenever they want.
46rAnd besides, everyone can see how sensitive Jack really is underneath in the big scene with his father,
47sWho is a vegetable,
48tBut Jack cries anyway when he talks to him,
49uBecause this is the same kind of communication they’ve always had,
50vJust like everybody in the audience,
51Which is still another reason why ‘Five Easy Riders’ will be the greatest movie ever made,
52Even though we haven’t even gotten to the big climax yet,
53Which is maybe the best part of all,
54wWhere Paul and Dennis and Jack are riding along on their motorcycle,
55xNot hurting anybody at all,
56yAnd not even thinking about hurting anybody,
57aBecause they’re so darned peaceful and loving at heart,
58When a bpickup truck comes out of nowhere and shoots them to death,
59cFor no reason at all,
60Which when you think about it,
61Is just exactly like modern life in America,
62And says it all.
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Chapter 56 / 58