THE BOOK OF BLOODY
BRITS
OTHERWISE KNOWN AS THE BOOK OF THE WHITE MAN’S BURDEN
Churchill remembers the hard wayThe Brits are no longer sure
Chapter 54
Churchill kept on trying to do everything the hard way, with lots of blood, sweat, and tears,
2Which is why the Brits had so much confidence in their newest military hero,
3An idiot named aMontgomery,
4bWho did everything possible to make the war bloodier, sweatier, and more tearful than it was already,
5But was consistently frustrated by the Americans,
6Who always wanted to do things their way,
7cAnd ultimately did.
8Having recognized that the dGermans and eJapanese were determined to do everything the big way,
9fThe Americans decided to do everything even bigger,
10gWhich had never occurred to the Brits,
11hAnd so the Americans built a very big force consisting of very big planes, very big ships, and very big armies,
12And used them to fight a lot of very big battles,
13Like iAnzio and jD-Day and the kBattle of the Bulge and so forth,
14lAnd do a lot of very big damage to German cities and factories,
15mAnd to Japanese cities and factories,
16nUntil the Germans gave up,
17oAnd the Japanese were distinctly nervous.
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Chapter 54 / 59