THE BOOK OF BLOODY
BRITS
OTHERWISE KNOWN AS THE BOOK OF THE WHITE MAN’S BURDEN
Nice uniforms make everything okayWellington confuses Napoleon
Chapter 22
Of course, the navy wasn’t the only Brit military organization that had such a fine tradition.
2The Brit army was almost as dutiful and honorable and traditional as the navy,
3And had very nice uniforms too,
4With bright red coats so that the enemy could see them coming,
5Since it wouldn’t have been fair to hide,
6Because hiding is too easy,
7And therefore not British.
8mThe Brit army officers were gentlemen, of course,
9And got to wear nice regimental neckties when they were home,
10Which made up for the fact that they always had to lead the attack,
11Against superior numbers of enemy troops,
12nAs required by tradition,
13While wearing special officers’ uniforms, which,
14Though nice,
15Made great otargets for enemy sharpshooters.
16The Brit enlisted soldiers were commoners, of course,
17pAnd had to do their duty too,
18qWhich consisted of always marching in neat rows,
19aToward the enemy,
20bNo matter what.
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Chapter 22 / 59